Things I really hate #3: White Rocks

If an Englishman’s home is his castle, then his lawn is something very precious indeed. I’d imagine that a lawn equivalent that you actually keep in a castle would have to be something like a virginal damsel with one of those pointy hats. Hence you wouldn’t want the local riff raff getting their grubby mitts on either your fair maiden or your closely, cropped turf.

Stretching this tenuous metaphor to it’s very limit is the only way I can explain why some people choose to ‘protect’ the verge outside their house with big white rocks. They are the crenellated, outer bailey wall of today’s semi-detached, dorma bungalow. I hate them.





I took these photo’s whilst on a site visit to a plot adjacent to this narrow drive (generally the less said the better). The problem being that it was so narrow that you couldn’t stop without blocking access to the rest of it. Shame you can’t park up on the verge…

First of all I think this looks a mess. But I also think it’s laying claim to something that is owned by everyone and not just yourself, i.e. the highway verge. It’s akin to people leaving nasty notes on your car when you park outside their, and I’m pleased to hear that some Councils are starting to take action against it.

Things I really hate #2: Crap Public Art

I like art. I like well-designed, public spaces. I’m not sure if I like public art.

Actually, I’m not altogether certain what public art really is. Is it simply art that is located in the public realm? Or is it art that is somehow created by the public, a bit like when someone’s auntie has their poem published in the local paper? You see the former - I like, the latter - I don’t.

I’m not saying that only art designed by arty types with fuzzy hair and ethnic pantaloons is suitable, but there does need to be some assessment of whether it is a worthwhile addition to the public realm, or just art produced by members of the public. You may think that your child’s painting is wonderful, but there’s a difference between displaying it on your fridge, or 50ft high in Town Hall Square. I also dislike the idea of art being 'worthy'.

It’s strange how both grammatically and in practice, the addition of one word to another can change it’s entire meaning. Rock and soft rock. Meat and reclaimed meat. Engineering and value engineering. Music and lift music. Sheets and polyester sheets. Landscape and landscape ping. Coke and diet Coke. Art and public art.



This piece of ‘public art’ from Bristol is an absolute classic, which made me sit up and write this blog entry. It’s as if they’ve laid a blue, dog turd into the very fabric of the paving.

Things I really hate #1

I really hate it when a space is paved in a material of the same colour, as the surrounding buildings. It nearly always seems to happen when you have brick buildings, like in the above picture (all pictures are of the lovely Bede Island in Leicester).

It's the built equivalent of when someones Dad decides it looks cool to wear both pale blue jeans and a denim shirt, or you see a really posh person in mustard coloured, corduroy trousers and a tweed jacket.

It. Just. Looks. Wrong.